Saturday, 5 October 2013

When She Cries

I wrote here about the best noise in the world- Jessica laughing. However, the flip side is also true. I really can't stand it when Jessica cries. And we are lucky. Compared to some girls with Rett, Jessica doesn't really cry a lot. I normally manage to take most things in my stride, but Jessica crying is not something I have a coping mechanism for.

But it is not rational. When Jessica's little sister cries (she is 16 months old) I know that it is because she is tired, or because I have taken away the remote control or telephone, saying that they are not a toy. I normally stay very calm and relaxed, knowing the moment will pass; and sometimes mildly amused if it is a relatively minor thing that has caused her to think her world has come to an end.

However, when Jessica cries, it is completely different. Even if I think I know why (if she is tired, for example) I still get very stressed. But what if she is tired and also in pain? Does she want to tell us something or do something and is really angry and frustrated that she can't? Is she bored? Then I go down the path that no parent should ever have to consider...  Does she hate her life? Is her quality of life reasonable? And then the plea (made to whom I don't know!) that this is not the start of typical Rett Girl crying ......

All these thoughts and I am sure that the majority of the time, Jessica is actually upset far less than your average 4 year old, and when she is, it is often because of the same things that cause your average 4 year old to be upset. As I said, we are very lucky that Jess doesn't cry a lot more. And long may it continue, as I don't know how I would cope.

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